Friends and Family,
Genevieve and I have had our sense of reality severely tested. Time, space, and sound have all been distorted.
Let's start with sound. Genevieve and I went to the same appointment together with Dr. Patel two weeks ago, and we both heard something very different.
Here's what I heard Dr. Patel say: "The good news is that your scan results look great and everything seems stable. However, OHSU compared these results to the ones you had nine months ago, so we really can't tell if there's any change."
Here's what Genevieve heard Dr. Patel say: "The good news is that you're still in remission." End of story.
How could I hear, "We really can't tell," while Genevieve hears, "You're in remission?"
I haven't heard the word "remission" from anybody except Genevieve for the last four years. When people ask her how I'm doing, she says, "He's doing great. He's in remission." I always took this as her affirmation, her imposing her intentions on the situation, her creating the reality that she wants to happen. Now, my doctor is teaming up with her to do this?
I don't know what to call it, or what he actually said. All I know is that I'm feeling great, my scans haven't changed, and we're going to keep celebrating.
OHSU had compared results from my CT scan, done two weeks ago in Portland, with ones done nine months earlier, also in Portland. The time in between, when I was having scans in San Diego, ceased to exist. The space/time continuum was then burst, as our UCSD (San Diego) radiologist said he would compare the last Portland scans with the most recent San Diego scans.
Next (I think), time moved backwards, as we waited for the results. Eventually time started creeping forward again, and we received Dr. Patel's email: "No results back from the radiologists yet, but I eyeballed your scan and it looks great." He eyeballed it? Did I just slip and fall into the rabbit hole? Since when do oncologists trust their eyeballs to compare scans, when they don't even have another scan to compare it to? How do we know he's not in some kind of spacial distortion?
Months later, in an email dated only three days later (proof of the time distortion), Dr. Patel emailed again: "CT of head and chest have been evaluated, and there's no change. Still looking great. However, we can't find the scan of your pelvis and abdomen to compare. Can you have OHSU burn another disc for you?" But before I even got to this email, time sped up and he sent a second email. "Never mind, we found it on the same disc. Won't be long now." Except it was. Very long. Weeeeeks (possibly hours) later, he emailed again. "CT of pelvis and abdomen have been evaluated. No change!"
Of course, with this great news, Genevieve and I went into a time loop and celebrated the CT results all over again. NO CHANGE! WOO HOO! TIME IS STANDING STILL FOR MY LUNGS!
Maybe we'll even celebrate by watching some 4th of July fireworks next week. :-)
Love,
Dann